STOP RANTING AND JUST DO IT...

SHINE

by Take That

You, you’re such a big star to me
You’re everything I wanna be
But you’re stuck in a hole and I want you to get out
I don’t know what there is to see
But I know it’s time for you to leave
We’re all just pushing along
Trying to figure it out, out, out.

All your anticipation pulls you down
When you can have it all, you can have it all.

So come on, so come on, get it on
Don’t know what you’re waiting for
Your time is coming don’t be late, hey hey
So come on
See the light on your face
Let it shine
Just let it shine
Let it shine.

Stop being so hard on yourself
It’s not good for your health
I know that you can change
So clear your head and come round

You only have to open your eyes
You might just get a big surprise
And it may feel good and you might want to smile, smile, smile.

Don’t you let your demons pull you down
‘Cause you can have it all, you can have it all.

Hey let me know you
You’re all that matters to me
Hey let me show you
You’re all that matters to me.

Hey let me love you
You’re all that matters to me
Hey so come on yeah
Shine all your light over me.

________________
That's right. I won't let my demons pull me down ever again.

RAGE, RAGE AGAINST THE DYING OF THE LIGHT

Last Sunday while doing grocery at Super 8 (yes, I’m starting to find ways to save more), I came across this woman who was reaching out for a bar of soap. Nothing wrong with the picture except that she’s been at it for 5 minutes or so – without moving.

She was just standing there, transfixed, her eyes blank.

It was unnerving.

It was more unnerving when I realized that I’ve had the same experience a few months back after Mom’s sudden death. I would just find myself staring at nothing – at work, on the bus, on the train. I would cry over the most unusual things like the Rainbow Connection song that my neighbor plays everyday. Then again, most people I know cry over that song.

I guess it does take some time to move on. I will laugh and smile when the circumstance calls for it, but it doesn’t mean I’m doing the same inside me. Does coping mean putting up a front? Methinks that would be unfair to friends and family who do try to help you go through the ordeal.

Fight back, Dylan. Fight back. Try to be worthy of the love being given you.

10 WAYS TO KILL YOURSELF WITHOUT EVEN TRYING

1.) Stick to your low-paying job simply because it’s near your house and you want to save on the fare;
2.) Live in a house whose rent you can’t really afford in the medium-term;
3.) Maintain utilities, i.e. cable TV, landline phone which you hardly use but keep anyway;
4.) Make bad business decisions and try to make lame excuses just to save face;
5.) Spend beyond your means;
6.) Oversleep and keep missing out on deadlines;
7.) Get more work load than you can ever handle in a lifetime;
8.) Live with an asthmatic yaya and a dog who’s choosy with what he eats;
9.) Spend beyond your means (wait, I already said that);
10.) Overeat from the depression caused by Items 1-9.

It’s like a bad dream. Thank God I have savings kahit paano.

Thanks for the constant reality checks. You know who you are.

RANT, RANT, RANT

Last night, time crawled. Literally. The evening seemed interminable and no matter how much I distracted myself it just seemed like I’m going to be stuck in the office so much longer. Every day is a pain now. I have to peel myself from bed just to make it to work on time.

Anyway, I wish to thank Just Jared for keeping me sane for the last 8 hours. Yeah, I do dig Hollywood gossip once in a while. It makes for entertaining reading, although it can become terribly boring after an hour or so. I really just have the attention span of a sperm lately.

It’s almost June and it’s time to shift to high gear for 4 weddings and a funeral – on the 9th, 15th, 16th, and 17th. And the 83rd NCAA on the 23rd. The latter will be my production-design career funeral if I don’t deliver on time.

Much has been said about my ability to worm myself out of a tight fix, but what I really hate is when others put me into one. Like the NCAA project – truly a shining example of others f***ing up and making others carry the brunt of feeling sorry for it. Sample 1: They want me to produce Crusader shields (for Letran) that turn 360 degrees at the arm rest – in two weeks. I mean, seriously! They should try doing it themselves. Last month, I turned down a project to do a product launch set at Crowne Plaza because I only had less than a week to think it up, and execute. That was even easier pero rotating shields? It’s crazy. Lesson 1: If you can’t do it, don’t take it.

Oh, and another headache from NCAA. They want the balloons to look like bombs so the show’s Director asked us to put paper tail fins on them. It wasn’t a demand or anything (“Dream lang naman, baka sakali,” he says but with a look that means “Kung ‘di niyo magagawa, I’d be so disappointed”.) I wouldn’t have violently reacted if the balloons numbered less than 3,000 which currently it is. Production value-wise, I don’t think spectators would appreciate the difference, although yeah, the idea is great but just impossible. Let’s say taping fins / balloon will take 5 minutes, multiply that by 3,000 divided by 60 minutes = 250 hours! I will need 60 people or thereabouts to finish it in 4 hours. And they’re not even willing to pay for manpower, eek! I approached 3 balloon companies and nobody was willing to do it at the budget of Php 50,000 +++ kaya dream on, Direk.

While I am writing this, some guys in Paete Laguna are rushing to meet the deadline for deliverables. I added a few hundreds on top of our negotiated price for the trouble. Pa-consuelo kumbaga. You have to pay good money if you want it fast – and good (Wait, does this apply to ….?). After all, there’s no price tag for good reputation.

I am keeping my fingers crossed. For the meantime, I really REALLY just want to sleep.

SOLO DIOS BASTA!

Nada te turbe, nada te espante todo se pasa,
Dios no se muda, la paciencia todo lo alcanza,
quien a Dios tiene nada le falta sólo Dios basta.

- Sta. Teresa de Hesus

In remembrance of the 100th day since Mom's passing and Mother's Day, Holy Masses will be celebrated in the following locations:

Immaculate Conception Chapel

Xavier University-Ateneo de Cagayan
Cagayan de Oro City

National Shrine of Our Lady of Mount Carmel

Gilmore, New Manila
Quezon City

Parish of St. Joseph (Bamboo Organ Church)

Las Piñas City

Special prayers will be held in the following locations:

Carmel of the Twin Hearts of Jesus and Mary
Carmelite Monastery
Malaybalay, Bukidnon

Carmelite Monastery
Zamboanga City

Once again, thank you so much for your help and prayers. God bless you all!

HIHIRIT PA!

Yesterday, I was searching for the website of the World Wildlife Fund Philippines and it led me to an abandoned site that now features "kittens" in various states of undress. They too may need some sort of conservation effort soon.

Straight guy to gay guy on the latter’s problems: “God won’t shove things down your throat, you know. But then again you might just like that.”

I just found out that our IT firewalled www.philstar.com so there’s no more chance for us to read the news. I think it’s a lifesaving measure.

Former President Ramos was questioned before on his decisions regarding the Smokey Mountain project and allegedly disadvantageous IPP contracts. He thought his problems would only last until Philippines 2000!!! (How does one read that again?).

A co-blogger is complaining of his ultra-slow internet connection at home. I imagine him to be caught in a world wide web.

My co-editor rushed through a dinner date to get to the office in time for graveyard shift. Now that’s what I call a quickie.

They say the world is an oyster. That explains why life is a lemon.

Happy weekend everyone!